8 JULY 2005 COCKPIT GLOSSARY From left to right: The Cockpit of the Flying Monkey Airlines Courtesy Bus, with (from L-R) Captain Nigel Parry, Assistant Navigation Officer and Chief Catering Supervisor Roo the Dog, and Captain James Duncan. Cockpit Terminology Definition Cruising Altitude How high the flight crew are at any given time. Turbulance What happens when an 18-wheeler truck passes an overloaded Ford E-150 Conversion Van at 65 miles per hour. Refueling A $50 ass-fucking at a BP or Speedway pump. Cabin Service The cooler between the driver's and passenger's seats, which forms the base of the sleeping quarters of Roo the Dog, Assistant Navigation Officer and Chief Catering Supervisor. Assistant Navigation Officer (ANO) The position given to the cutest member of the flight crew, whose job is to secure directions from beautiful farmers' daughters when lost on secondary roads. On this flight, Roo the Dog is the ANO. In any profession, there is a specific technical language to learn. As the Courtesy Bus is the sole vehicle in the entire Flying Monkey Airlines fleet, captains must utilise every opportunity they have to stay current with the terminology needed for their challenging careers as professional pilots. All flight legs are preceded by a detailed pre-flight check and all piloting decisions are passed by both senior crew members. To help you understand the language of the cockpit, Flying Monkey Airlines has prepared this useful glossary. Captain Nigel Parry, writing from the cockpit of the Flying Monkey Airlines Courtesy Bus, 7-9 July 2005.
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